9th Street District - Durham

Reading the description of the 9th street district was like being called home. Espresso, Indian food, a funky dance studio, bookstore, toy store...the list goes on. The whole street has a hip, groovy feel to it. Our first stop was the Hunky Dory Eclectic Emporium. http://www.hunkydorydurham.com/default.aspx?qryid=6.  A name like that you have to go in, right? Hmm, head shop. Bongs and disc golf supplies. Always good to know where to go to buy a bong. Pretty awesome vinyl collection though. I was flipping through the albums while Brandy was looking at clothes. I came across a Linda Ronstadt that said "free" on the price tag. Anytime I'm out shopping and can't find a price on something I mutter, "Well, it must be free." to myself. Here I'd found something that said free on the price tag! I had to have it.

The guy behind the counter suggested I put the LP in the oven and make a bowl out of it. That could be an interesting chip bowl. I'm not so sure I want to do that to Linda. Next we checked out a bookstore called The Regulator, http://regulatorbookshop.com/. I was in hog heaven. So many books, so little time. I could have stayed til they closed. I saw Bran looking frustrated as she was trying to get around a group of ladies clumped together waiting for book club. Mommy had to show her how it's done. These ladies were well versed in southern hospitality because when I barreled through the middle of them, they all apologized. I heard a snippet of their conversation. "Oh I can't come to your book club, I haven't read the book." With the perfect southern accent this wonderful older black woman says. "That doesn't matter darlin', all we really do is gossip about people anyway." I walked out of that shop with a huge smile on my face.

Our last stop was Francesca's Dessert Caffe. http://www.francescasdessertcaffe.com/.  Interesting mix of clientele you wouldn't expect to see in the same place. Two older ladies sharing a dessert. College kids, business men, couples. We ordered coffees, I got cake, Brandy got pie. They gave me my coffee and I wanted to ask where it's mother was. Teeny tiny little mug. Sometimes good things come in small packages. Not today. Coffee has to be pretty bad for me not to drink it. This was bad. My big, amazing piece of cake was bad too. Brandy didn't do too much better with hers. Oh well, we didn't need the calories anyway. 

We abandoned the coffee, took our free album and headed for Roxboro.

Virginia Beach

The only thing that could top a night of sushi, beer, cupcakes and turkish coffee is a trip to the beach. Brandy's older sister lives in Norfolk, Va which is roughly three hours from Roxboro. Sidebar - to pronounce Norfolk the way the locals do you pretty much have to drop the "F" bomb yet they have signs posted saying you'll be fined if you swear. We had our first fight on the way to Virginia because I got lost...again. Bran's phone was saying get off on exit 13, 14, 15, my directions said get off on exit 13, 14, 15 but I kept on the highway towards Richmond. Maybe the multi-numbered exit confused me? I don't know. Her phone got us to her sisters house. I was mad about the direction business and told them to go on to the beach, I was going to Richmond! (Just because I'm 42 doesn't mean I'm always mature and rational.) I'd lived in Richmond when I was 5 and wanted to see it again anyway. Well...I got lost and couldn't find the highway to take me to Richmond plus I really did want to spend the day at the beach with my daughter. I called her and she gave me directions to where they were. 

They were at a fish joint called Big Sam's. http://www.bigsamsrawbar.com/  The food smelled great but I opted for cocktails. When we got to the beach we went to another restaurant for more cocktails and so I could change into my suit. It's probably good I don't remember the name of this one. The drinks were good, the veggie plate was good, the server was bad. He tried to apologize by saying he had to work his second job later that evening. I don't care...I didn't tell you to work two jobs dude. This place was right on the beach so after we left there we stepped out on the sand.

The beach was beautiful and there were no breast implants on the sand or in the water. The two girls set up their chairs and lounged. I went to play in the ocean. The ocean stole my sunglasses in a matter of seconds. I felt a little bad since they were Brandy's. I saw a man a few yards from me lose his too. Despite having my sunglasses stolen by the sea, I was having a great time. I couldn't remember the last time I'd really played in the ocean. (the jelly fish water doesn't count, I was too weirded out to enjoy that.) I ventured out a little deeper thinking I could avoid the breaking waves and play in the gentler ones. Ha. A wave came. A big one. There was no point in running. I stood there helplessly staring in horror as it grew bigger. It hit and try as I might I couldn't keep my feet, down I went. I couldn't tell which way was up. I was thinking maybe I'd end up wherever my sunglasses had gone when I collided with something. A person! There was a person under the waves with me! Maybe he'll know which way is up! I grabbed him around the waist and hung on for dear life. When he stood up he had a very grateful woman attached to him. We both laughed, I thanked him for saving me and went to build a sand castle.

For dinner we went to the Biergarden http://www.biergarden.com/  in nearby Portsmouth. I had a beer called the Golden Monkey, just because the name was funny. It was good and it wasn't pink. Very pleasant evening spent with Brandy, her sister Ashley and fiance Kevo. 

Riding home from the Biergarden we had to go through a tunnel. Up to this point we'd all been very animatedly chatting. A few feet into the tunnel all conversation stopped. I didn't see any signs saying it was a silent tunnel but it was. I found this highly amusing but was trying not to laugh when I heard Brandy start chuckling in the backseat. That's all it took, I was full blown laughing, Brandy was full blown laughing. Ashley and Kevo were looking at us like we were both nuts. Nothing like a good belly laugh while people are looking at you like you belong in a mental institution. 

Very glad I couldn't find the highway to Richmond.

Beer, Cupcakes, Sushi and Turkish Coffee - Raleigh

Brandy's first weekend here we decided to go see what Raleigh's about. A co-worker directed me to a bar. Seriously, I work with four men who are all in their twenties and they keep telling me about great bars to try. We decided to start at one of the bars. It gave us a jumping off point. Raleigh is divided into districts sort of like Durham but on a larger scale. It's the busiest city I've seen so far. I was in heaven.

Our night began at The Flying Saucer, http://www.beerknurd.com/. They've got about a million beers on tap. Our bartender was very helpful. I suspect she gets tired of women coming in and saying, "I don't know what I want...I don't really like beer." Then why are you in a beer joint?! She came up with a mixture of two beers for my daughter and for me that both ended up being pink but delicious. Maybe it was an editorial comment on women and beer...I don't know. Hints of raspberry. According to man law you're not supposed to put fruit in beer but it wasn't bad. 

After beer, we discovered Raleigh is crawling with rickshaw drivers. Translate, cute boys on bikes with wagons attached. They were everywhere. We managed to dodge them. "Would you ladies like a ride?" "Oh, no thanks, we're just heading across the street."  Across the street was where we'd spotted The Cupcake Shoppe, http://www.thecupcakeshopperaleigh.com/index.html. The rickshaw driver enthusiastically yelled "Cupcakes!"  What better way to get the fruity beer taste out of our mouths? The girl working the cupcake shoppe hadn't gotten the memo on southern hospitality but she gave me chocolate so it was okay. Yeah...I'm that easy.

Lots of cool things on Glenwood Avenue, an art gallery Brandy wouldn't go in. A gym called heat studios where you exercise with rubber bands strapped to the wall. What a fun way to break an arm! A pizza place called Bada Bing which made  us wonder where Bada Boom was.

Several dinner choices. We opted for Sushi. Cast iron stomachs are a blessing and a curse. I got something called a bunny roll, vegetarian. Brandy got something with raw fish. (The concept of Sushi passes me...you're supposed to cook meat...don't even get me started on carpaccio.) She liked mine better. You know why? No raw meat. I'm just sayin.

We ended the evening at a turkish coffee store. http://www.turkishdelightsusa.com/ At first I thought the women behind the counter were stalking us, thinking maybe we'd shoplift but then I realized they were just trying to take our order. Bran got an uncomplicated latte and baklava. I ordered turkish coffee, seemed fitting. Turkish coffee takes some time to brew so we wandered around. Gorgeous vases for sale, gelato, desserts including turkish delight. I'd wanted to try turkish delight for years thanks to The Chronicles of Narnia. My sister got me some for Christmas one year. It was NOT delightful. It's rose scented goo covered in a little powdered sugar...like that's going to make it taste better. When my coffee got ready it was brought to me in a lovely glass coffee mug. "Oh, I'm sorry. I wanted that to go." This was upsetting to the ladies that work there. Seems you can't change your mind about the coffee once its made. That's when I noticed the signs about not adding milk or sugar to the turkish coffee once it's brewed. The grounds are brewed into the coffee and you can't disturb the grounds. After much discussion and with my solemn vow that I'd let the grounds settle before any attempts at drinking the coffee, she put it in a to go mug and we were permitted to leave. I didn't touch it for a while because I swear that woman would have somehow known, found me and forced me to eat rose flavored goo. It was the strongest coffee I've ever had, certainly worth the wait. I give Raleigh a two thumbs up.

BRANDY!!!!!

Brandy, my oldest child, decided to come stay with me for a couple of weeks. WOO HOO!!!! Someone, other than myself to talk to! Don't get me wrong, I'm a delightful conversationalist but I always agree with me, I know what I'm going to say next...gets very dull. I miss having someone to talk to. This is evidenced by my inability to stop talking to myself. But more than anything I miss my kids. I don't miss my house, the street I live on, the town I live in. I don't miss these things at all. At all! My kids...man do I miss them. Like crazy do I miss them. And one of them will be here soon.

When I heard Brandy pull in I immediately welled up. I ran outside and hugged her, reassuring her my tears were happy tears and that I'd stop in a minute. I gave her a few minutes to settle in before I told her the awesomely fun thing I'd signed us up for. A free trial salsa class! Her face said it all. Really, I'm not  sure why I did it. The girl won't even chair dance. "Seriously, Mom? What were you thinking?" We didn't go to salsa. We ate salsa at a couple different places. It was more fun with someone else along. We don't always get along. Hello, we're Mother and Daughter. There was a fight where one of us said. "I'm going to Richmond!" Ah but it was so great having her here and I'm so sad that she's gone and I'm back to talking to myself again...

Sigh

Morgan Imports - Durham

http://www.morganimports.com/

I'm getting all my input about where to go from a 27 year-old man who loves beer, trucks and camping...not that there's anything wrong with that. Just not my cup of tea. I want to find art galleries, decadent vegetarian food and a yoga class. My 27 year-old buddy is no help with any of this. He did however point me to the Brightleaf district, which is where I found Morgan Imports.

Morgan Imports has about three floors and I need almost everything in that store. The picture above is a set of salt and pepper shakers I found there. Sumo salt and pepper shakers...how funny is that? It was either the wrestlers or a pair of ninja's. The way I cook, I chose the Sumo. I can't even begin to tell you all the amazing things they have, you'll just have to go there yourself. I found a bracelet for five dollars. I got an eighty-seven dollar necklace for ten. 

When the gentleman rang me up, he looked shocked by the price. "Um...that's a really good deal!" I was prepared to go toe to toe if I had to but it didn't come to that. "You don't know me but this necklace is so me."  "Oh I can tell." We chatted for a bit. He asked if I was an actor. Made my day. Possibly he thought I look like Roseanne but I chose to take it as a compliment. "I'm from Cincinnati, here for the summer, what do I need to see before I go home?" Out came a map and several suggestions. He even gave me the name of a Yoga studio. 

Brightleaf Square - Durham

http://www.historicbrightleaf.com/index.html

The person I work most closely with here in North Carolina is a 27 year-old boy. Anytime I've asked him for ideas of what to do, I've been given the name of a bar. Sigh...I'm a 42 year-old single Mother of 4, what am I going to do in a bar? Shit, that's how I ended up with the first kid! He suggested I try Brightleaf Square in Durham. "There's some really cool bars down there." Of course there are. He mentioned a mexican place he and his wife really like and the clincher...gelato. Now we're talking! And I already knew how to get there since I'd passed it when I was lost on the way to work. Off to Brightleaf.

Durham is divided into several districts. Brightleaf Square is in the middle of the Brightleaf District. There are quite a few restaurants and shops. A bookstore which is never open. I pulled on the door several times before giving up. There was a lady behind the counter and I know she saw me. Rude...must be a Northerner. The grooviest record store ever, Offbeat Records. And yes, heavenly gelato at the Amelia cafe.

My favorite store is Vert and Vogue. http://www.vertandvogue.com/store/index.php They sell eco-friendly clothes and shoes. The feel of these fabrics almost makes up for the not so wallet-friendly prices. The very helpful, very friendly people who work there do make up for the prices. Why IS organic anything so freakin expensive? They are transplanted yankees who clearly embrace Southern hospitality. When I asked about things to do in the area, she gave me a map and circled some of her favorite spots. She even called one of them to find out if they had a band that evening. I bought three t-shirts which were about fifty percent off. This fabric is crazy. I have a t-shirt at home that's so old and has been washed so many times it feels like silk. It's so threadbare I can't wear it in front of anyone. I sleep in it all the time. That's what the shirts I bought at Vert and Vogue feel like. My almost obscene sleep shirt, but they look amazing. I went back a couple days later and bought two more.

My daughter found an upscale resale store in Brightleaf. Fifi's Fine Resale http://www.fifisconsignment.com/index.html. They had Jimmy Choo's for two hundred dollars. I'm not paying two hundred for anything in a resale store! (they weren't my size.) I did however find an amazing skirt for ten bucks. It's covered in gold sequins which if I stand in the right light I can use to blind someone with. 

Shirt from Vert and Vogue - $11, Skirt from Fifi's - $10, blinding people with my sequins? Priceless!

Southern Hospitality

Being from Ohio, I'm used to hateful, grumpy people everywhere I go. Everyone is in too much of a hurry for anything like social graces. In a crowded store people will barrel right at you. No eye contact, no excuse me. They're the bull, you're the red flag. Get out of the way or get run into. I hold my ground.  Come on, run into me. This tactic almost always works. When they realize their path is blocked, they'll look up, say an embarrassed "Excuse me." and walk around. 

The first time I went to the grocery here in the south, I wasn't sure what was going on. People smiled at me. They got out of the way...really they were never in the way. They stayed on their side of the aisle while I was on mine. No one ran in front of me or reached across me for something on the shelf. Then when I got to the check out lane, the boy ringing me up not only smiled at me, he unloaded my cart! I was so taken aback by this I was convinced I was making a grocery faux pas. "Am I supposed to do something other than stand here?" I blurted out. He did a double take. "Um...no, ma'am, you're fine." Then the little shit smiled at me and started laughing. "What?" I asked starting to feel even more uncomfortable. "Well, no ones ever asked me that before." I looked around. All the cashiers were unloading groceries and being polite to the customers. Very confusing. I felt like I was in Pleasantville.

When I walk through the hospital, everyone I pass smiles and say's "Hey." (Hey is southern for hello in case you were wondering.) People are even polite in Wal-mart! Wal-mart!...A cashier in a store downtown was waving me to her register. Two women stepped in front of me. The cashier smiled politely at them and said, "I'll get you right after I get this lady." The two women very graciously stepped out of my way and even chit chatted with me! If that had happened in Cincinnati a brawl would have ensued. 

I took myself out to lunch. I sat at the bar so I wouldn't be a tiny little woman in a huge booth again. The woman beside me started up a conversation. It wasn't one of those awful conversations with a stranger who you wish would just shut the hell up and let you eat in peace. She was extremely nice and pleasant. She and the bartender were full of ideas of fun places for me to try while I'm here.

I was approached by a man on the street begging for money. He was so polite about his begging. I gave him a dollar.

Is it sad that my first instinct when confronted with manners and politeness is to distrust it? 

Tale of The Whale

http://www.taleofthewhalenagshead.com/

I got lost on my first trip to Nag's Head. It took me so long to get there it was almost dark when I got to the beach. I decided to treat myself to a nice meal, head back to the Inn and try the beach again tomorrow. Nag's Head in July, the midst of tourist season, is very crowded. I drove around for a bit looking for a restaurant that struck my fancy. I was about to give up finding what I had in mind when I spotted the Tale of The Whale. This picture is from their website but it's pretty much what I saw while driving up.

I got a table right away. Impressive for a busy Saturday night. I don't normally mind eating dinner alone. I find I'm a delightfully entertaining dinner companion. I get all my jokes...But I felt a little out of place here. Maybe it was because there were so many families. Nag's Head is a place for family vacations. Maybe it was because they put me in a booth that would comfortably seat eight. The table was so big I would've needed to stretch to pass myself the salt. 

I ordered a glass of wine and the bruschetta. It's drizzled in a sauce that looks like Hershey's chocolate syrup. I figured it wasn't chocolate syrup but you never know. Some cooks do weird stuff. Smelled amazing so I dipped a finger in. OH MY GOD! So flippin good! I ate as much of that stuff as I could stuff in. The rest I ate later while reading in bed. (probably they don't like you to eat in bed at a bed and breakfast but I didn't care, it was that good) The server told me it was a balsamic reduction sauce. I've cooked with balsamic vinegar on many an occasion but it never tasted like that! I asked my very helpful and friendly server if he knew how to get back to Edenton. I had no desire to get lost again. Turns out the owners are from Edenton. They gave me very thorough directions. She wrote them down. She even offered to give me her cell number so I could call if I got lost. Now that's hospitality! If that had happened in Cincinnati I would have been lucky to get directions let alone have the proprietor offer to give me her number!

Very enjoyable experience. I will definitely take the kids there for dinner when they get down here. It will be nice to fill the table!

Nag's Head

The beach at last! As mentioned in a previous post, I got lost on the way to the beach so it was already getting dark when I arrived at the Outer Banks. I planned to stick my feet in the ocean, treat myself to a nice meal then drive back to the bed and breakfast. My first visit to the ocean in more than a decade lasted about twenty minutes. As I got to the end of a boardwalk I came even with a young man who was staring at the ocean. "Look." he said without turning to look at me. I followed his gaze and out in the water I saw two surfers floating on their boards. Suddenly, a few feet from them I saw two fins come up then go back down. "What were those?" I asked, thinking immediately of the movie Jaws. "Dolphins." Cool. The smell of the sea, my feet in the waves, dolphin fins rising and falling as the sun set over the ocean. It was an awesome twenty minutes.

The next day I drove back to Nag's Head, the shorter way wherein which I did not get lost. (Okay, I did get a little messed up but got back on track quickly.) The beach in the light of day. Aaaahhhh. The ocean. It doesn't make me feel small and insignificant, it makes me feel like I'm part of something big and amazing. 

Normally I'm quite content standing with my feet in the water because...well...things live in there. Things that bite and sting. Sharks don't come into my living room, I don't go into theirs. I am okay sitting on the beach. But wow. It was hot! Maybe I could get in up to my knees...As I got closer to the water I noticed a plethora of gelatinous objects on the sand. Upon closer inspection they appeared to be breast implants. Hmm...I always wondered where those came from. They're everywhere. Breast implants as far as the eye can see. It looked like a plastic surgeon's playground. They had to be jelly fish, nothing else made sense. I was NOT getting into jelly fish water.

But it was so hot...

Lots of people were swimming. And not writhing in agony from jelly fish stings. I ventured in up to my ankles being very careful to avoid stepping on the breast implant/jellyfish. Then I see people picking the gelatinous masses up and throwing them at each other. It must be okay so I went a little further in. I didn't put a swim suit on because I wasn't planning on getting in. My dumb ass walked into the ocean thinking I'd stay dry. Not sure what I was thinking. The ocean is unpredictable. I'm in six inches of water when a wave hits and completely soaks me. Sigh. 

I played in the breast implant water for a while then sat on my towel to dry off. What a glorious day. I packed up my belongings and headed to my car. My car which I'd be driving in for four hours. Four hours in wet sandy clothes. Whose brilliant idea was that? I was grumbling and loading my car when I saw the bag with the sundress I'd bought in Edenton. I knew that dress would come in handy!

Hmmm...

The woman standing next to her car in Nag's Head very skillfully removing wet clothes from under a dress? That would be me. Girls learn at a very young age how to disrobe without actually disrobing. It's a skill. I stopped for falafel then headed home to Roxboro. And I didn't get lost!

The Captain's Quarter's Inn, Edenton, North Carolina

My first weekend on my own I had two choices. Sit in my tiny little house alone or drive to the beach. Tough choice...I got in the car and headed for the Outer Banks. Three hours one way. I looked for a hotel but they were all outrageous. Who knew it would be so expensive to rent a room at the beach in July! Heck with that! I found a cute little B and B in Edenton, about an hour from the beach. I liked the idea of a bed and breakfast because hey...free breakfast. Who doesn't like free breakfast? 

http://www.captainsquartersinn.com/

This was my view from their porch. Gorgeous house, fabulous food, comfortable room at a very reasonable price. I asked the proprietor for directions around the town. She directed me about a block away from the Inn where I found a pier I could walk on. Cute little shops, great restaurants. I bought a fun little dress. I'm not normally a dress kind of girl but you never know when a summery dress might come in handy. (It did.) Edenton is a fun town but I wanted to see the ocean. I asked the owner of the Inn for directions to Nag's Head. It was supposed to be an hour and fifteen minutes away but ended up being three. Either she is terrible at giving directions or I'm terrible at listening to them. (I'm going with me being terrible at listening to them, see post entitled Getting Lost). When I finally made it back from the beach I settled into my room for the evening. This was my first experience at a bed and breakfast. Essentially you're in a really big house with strangers sleeping in the next room. There are rules of etiquette. Like if you've gotten back late because you can't follow directions and are too stubborn to buy a GPS you should tiptoe up the stairs and get into your room as silently as you can. If you're in bed reading a book that makes you laugh out loud you should muffle the laughter as much as possible. I thought I was going to burst something trying to hold it in. And you know, the more you try to hold laughter in the harder it is...I mean really what are people going to think? I'm the only single person there and I'm laughing by myself at midnight? 

Then, just when I got myself settled down. 

A man starts screaming. "Help! Oh Help! Help!!!" I bolt upright and wait to hear sounds of footsteps, of ambulances. Something to indicate whether I need to run and help or run like hell. I hear muffled voices then silence. Neither of these require my attention. After a few minutes I start feeling indignant. I didn't know you could scream...Had I known screaming was acceptable in a B and B, I wouldn't have worked so hard to hold my laughter in.

In the morning, there is coffee right outside my door. I wish the coffee fairy would come every morning. An elderly couple emerges from the room beside mine. "Bad dream last night?" I ask the gentleman as I'm pouring more coffee. "Oh! I'm so sorry!" the wife says. The man looks a bit embarrassed but frowns. "If you heard me yelling for help, why didn't you help me?" We all laughed and headed down to breakfast. 

Honestly I'm not much of a breakfast eater. Normally I'm too groggy for anything as complex as chewing and swallowing but this was part of the package. Free breakfast. Omelet with peppers, cheese and mushrooms. I don't even like mushrooms but this was amazing. Fruit, bacon, toast and all the coffee I could drink. Now that's what I'm talking about! After breakfast I took my coffee onto the porch to enjoy the view. 

If you're ever in Edenton, check out The Captain's Quarters. If you ask for directions to the beach...it's probably best to write them down.

Getting Lost

Being in a new city I had a reasonable expectation I'd lose my way a time or two but I've been lost so many times it borders on ridiculous. I could buy a GPS but I hate them. I've been in the car with various friends and family who aren't paying attention to their driving, they're paying attention to the voice coming out of the GPS. "It's Bevis and Butthead! Isn't that funny?" Sigh. And people will obey these things even if they're being told to drive off a cliff. Seriously, my sister is the worst. We got lost going to our Dad's house. Yes, our Dad's house. If I hadn't made her stop so we could ask the people we'd passed three times while circling a city block, we'd still be there. A permanent fixture in the town. I suppose if I had a GPS I wouldn't have gotten lost on my way to work the second day. (admitted begrudgingly) I got there with no trouble the first day. I figured I'd have no trouble the next.

I was wrong.  

I went to Henderson from Roxboro via Durham...for those who don't know, that's forty minutes out of my way...oops. It worked out though because the next evening when I went out to explore Durham I knew how to get there. 

Get there, yes, no problem. Get back...Not so much.

When I finally caved in and stopped for directions I was not in a great part of town. I asked the gentleman pumping gas behind me because he didn't look like a serial killer or a drunk. He was new in town and had no clue. At least he didn't kill me. I found my way back.

I even got lost inside the hospital. I thought I was going to the downstairs rehab gym but instead I ended up walking in on a surgery. You'd think the surgical area of the hospital would be marked off a little better! I didn't stick around to ask any questions I just got the hell out of there.

The most embarrassing or at least the most dangerous was when I went the wrong way down an off ramp. I was trying to get on the highway and somehow messed that up. The "wrong way" signs and the car heading straight for me made me realize immediately what I'd done. I've always thought the game of chicken was pretty dumb so rather than engage I pulled into the grass median. My opponent slowed down and asked me if I was okay. I waved him on. Okay? Debatable. My only defense is I don't function well at six am.

I got lost on a day trip to the Outer Banks, turning a one hour trip into three. I called my sister for that one. She got on google maps and talked me in. Sigh. Day trip to Virginia Beach took an hour longer than it should have...

Tried to get to the lake ten minutes from my rental house and ended up in Virginia.

Wonder where I can go to get a GPS...

Being Alone for the First Time

I'm aware this idea of moving to North Carolina for the summer was mine. I wanted to escape Ohio and snow and get the hell away from the depression Goblin. What I hadn't counted on was how much it was going to suck to leave my kids. I'd been so concerned about how they were going to take being away from me for a month I hadn't thought about how I'd feel being away from them. That thought didn't hit me until about a week before I was scheduled to leave. Contracts were signed, rent had been paid, there was no backing out. That's when I started to panic. A whole month without my kids?! Without my dogs?! Alone?!

Wait...alone? Hmm. Maybe alone is good. I wouldn't know. I've never lived alone. I went from my Mom's house to being the Mom of the house. I've been a Mom for 25 years...I have no frame of reference here. Maybe alone is good.

I hugged all four kids, put happy cow in the car and drove off valiantly fighting back tears. A battle quickly lost. No kids. No finding a blue crayon has gone through the wash the hard way. No peanut butter in my hair. No fruitless searches for my favorite shirt only to find it months later in the trunk of my daughters car...Hmm. Again, I have no frame of reference but maybe alone is good.

It took about three hours in my new home to come to the decision that alone is not for me. It's so quiet. Too quiet. Quiet in a house with four kids and three dogs is never a good thing. Quiet makes me uneasy. I started doing a running dialogue of my every move just to have noise.

"Okay, I guess I'll go into the kitchen now." 

"Maybe I'll have pizza for dinner." 

"Back to the living room." 

"I really need to stop talking to myself out loud." 

five seconds later

"Guess I should shower." 

Sadly, I'm not kidding or embellishing. I miss my kids terribly but I'm doing this to improve quality of life for all of us. At the very least we'll have a great summer by the beach. I plan to spend my time before they get here finding amazing things for us to do together. 

"It's late. I should really get to bed."

Snow Miser

I live in Ohio. I don't mean to live in Ohio but that's how it worked out. My parents divorced, Mom's family was here so this is where we came. I've tried to escape a few times but always get sucked back in. Like Ohio is a vortex I can't escape. A snowy, gloomy vortex. 


I want to live somewhere snow doesn't happen. Depressed people need sunlight. All people need sunlight!


This past winter was especially bad. We didn't get to see the sun. I'm not kidding, the only good thing about snow is the way it sparkles in the sun. But we didn't have sun. I think the manufacturers of Zoloft worked out a deal with Snow Miser and the sun wasn't allowed to come out. Either that or God hates Ohio as much as I do. Either way, I say to my ex. "I hate Ohio, lets move." Now I didn't think for a second he'd say okay to this but he said. "I hate it too. Pick somewhere. Anywhere you want to go, I'll go too." 


What??!!


I would never take the kids away from their Father so I'd reconciled myself to living in Ohio until the kids were older. But he agreed...I figured I'd better move on this before he changed his mind. Or got one of those snow loving girlfriends.


Being a part of the medical field has many perks. Job security because someone is going to fall off something or trip over something and need a hip replaced. (I can say this because I myself have had four surgeries from falling on...wait for it...snow...okay it was ice but the two go hand in hand.) Another perk is travel positions. I could take a temporary job for the summer, we could all check out the area and decide if it's somewhere we'd like to live. My first choice. North Carolina. I'd lived there when I was little and I'd always wanted to go back. Beaches, lakes, lots of things to do and best part... 


It doesn't snow much.


I called an agency and before I knew it I had a travel position lined up for the summer. My ex and I worked it out that he'd keep the kids for the first half of the summer then bring them to me for the second half. It will be hard to be away from them. The longest I've ever been away from them is five days. But I can get the lay of the land and they can have some quality Daddy time. North Carolina, here I come!

Happy Cow

When I found Happy Cow, I was in the midst of a depression no one could be expected to survive. It was like a two hundred pound goblin had jumped on my back. One that whispered into my ear, "You suck. Your life sucks. Everything sucks. But more than anything, YOU suck." Makes it hard to stand up. Makes it hard to walk through Hobby Lobby, which is where I was. Depression goblin on my back hoping the rows of chotchkies would distract me. Perhaps I'd buy a cake pan shaped like a rose and bake a cake with my youngest daughter. Cake pan...that was it, that would make me happy. I turned down an aisle searching for cake pans but what I found was a Valentines Day sale. Nothing but red vases as far as the eye can see. Elegant red vases. 


That's when I spotted him. Happy Cow.


The most ridiculous cow I'd ever seen. Blue, with flowers, clouds, trees and two gloriously happy children painted on his sides. Right there, in my hands in the middle of Hobby Lobby, I hold the happiest cow on Earth! Depression would never bring this cow down. I chuckled, set him back on the shelf and resumed my search for a cake pan. But my mind kept drifting back to that cow. "No one's going to buy that stupid cow. He's ridiculously out of place being in an aisle of vases. How's he going to stay happy if he doesn't find a home?"


 (I realize he's an inanimate object with no real feelings but give me a break, I'm lugging around a two hundred pound depression goblin and searching for happiness in Hobby Lobby!) 


I briskly made my way back to the aisle of vases. He was waiting for me. I placed him in my cart and took him home, along with some flower cupcake holders. I gave him a place of honor on my dresser. Gave me something pleasant to look at during the night when I was enjoying my insomnia, another side effect of depression. What would it take to make me as happy as that cow? This is my quest.